All   About   Sex  

What People Are Saying About
"All About Sex"

Believing that we are doing the right thing for kids has been a source of strength as this website was being built and expanded and "fine-tuned".   But even more re-affirming are the many messages of support that have come in from people pre-viewing the site.  I cannot tell you how much I have appreciated all of this positive support.

Here are just a few...


Comments From Dr. Betty Dodson About This Website!

We are very honored and encouraged by the words expressed by Dr. Dodson after we met and she spent time reviewing the All About Sex website:

    AllAboutSex is a must visit site for everyone interested in the sexual well being of America's youth. The information is thoughtful, and best of all, we get to hear from the kids themselves. In the many decades I've been advocating masturbation as the ongoing love affair we all have with ourselves throughout our lifetime, society continues to deny the sexuality of children. A big mistake, especially if want our children to become happy, healthy and sexually expressed adults.

    Betty Dodson, Ph.D.
    Author: Sex for One

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Dear Randal,

Thank you so much for your July 12 email.   We appreciate your support for the Foundation's work and for Drew Barrymore as spokesperson, and we're so pleased that you've been kind enough to add our link to your site.

Speaking of which, your site is incredible!   We love it and believe wholeheartedly in what you're doing with it.   We will certainly forward your email to Drew so that she, too, can see what a beautiful thing you're doing.

Again thank you for your support and for the valuable resource your site absolutely is.

Sincerely,
The Female Health Company

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Hi:

I wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed your site, it's great.   I will be including a link to your site in my Puberty/Sexuality links, part of a new Teen Advice site I have started for The Mining Company at http://teenadvice.miningco.com.   What a fabulous resource you have here for kids.

Stephanie Baker-Thomas, PhD

Later, Dr. Baker-Thomas said:
When I found your site I just loved it and plan to come back and read more.   I hope you are able to get caught up and start responding to the kids again because you have a real opportunity to make a difference.   Your energy and passion for the topic really shine through in what you do, you're articulate as hell and it's important stuff that kids need to know about.

Stay in touch and I hope you'll keep up your site and make it grow even more helpful.   I like it that you include parents stuff in there too.

    OUR COMMENTAfter several subsequent conversations with Dr. Baker-Thomas, I am thrilled to have her support.  She is a very experienced child psychologist who has participated in over a thousand child abuse investigations, and who recognizes that children *ARE* sexual beings, with sexual feelings, thoughts and desires, and that this is very NORMAL.   Dr. Baker-Thomas is the first therapist that I have felt has a realistic and honest grasp on typical childhood sexuality.   Oh yes, Stephanie, please *DO* keep on straightening out those colleagues!

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Dear AAS

I'm hoping its no inconvenience for me to write... But I wanted to thank you - I recently came across your WebPage (AllAboutSex....), more or less by accident really, But I was very touched. (uhh - no pun intended)... I found your material to be very intelligent and sensible, and presented in a very sweet and careing way. I was moved.

As a single mom of a 9 year old girl, Ive been just trusting my gut-instincts regarding how to educate on this topic, and how to encourage and support her development and self-awareness to be something thats healthy and positive. Youre right - there is an overwhelming amount of social "taboo" in our society regarding discussing the subject openly, even between adults. But your page was very open, careing, and was reassuring to me. I just wanted to tell you - I think thats an incredibly awesome page - very well thought out and very creative (as well as technically excellent btw...). You do a great job of talking in a really sweet and comfy way about a subject that most people feel really uncomfy talking about. Just wanted to say good job!

I felt positively enough about it that last evening I invited my daughter to join me and together we went through several sections of your site related to preteens.... The experience brought up some important discussions, and I feel as though I know and understand her better, and she had fun and clearly benefitted as well.... So thank you!

I felt motivated to offer my help in some way. I read through your volunteer page, and saw that you are needing assistance in a number of ways... Unfortunately I cant claim to be a credentialed expert professional in any particular area - at 28 I still dont have bunches and bunches of letters behind my name yet.... Im workin on it though - but as I said Im a single mom, I have to work, and so - my graduate school is fourth priority at best - First is my daughter, second priority is work, and Ive learned to make me as a person at least the third priority - so...

My point was going to be - that I would like to help and potentially could offer some assistance in the areas of editing, doing literature searches, identifying valuable books/articles/web resources, or potentially even answering questions (as a semi-expert at best - most likely as a non-expert but, simply a thoughtful person...)

At any rate - just wanted to say thanks again and let you know - I support the work you are doing - it is valuable to people and shows that you are a very sweet and careing person...

Thanks Again

Miranda

    OUR COMMENTMiranda - To say the least, your letter is no inconvenience... quite the opposite!   You have no idea how much a comment like this can do for me, as the webmaster and primary writer, and for the others participating in this site.

    It is fantastic to learn that you used the site to talk with your daughter about sexuality and to get to know her better, as that is exactly the goal of even having a pre-teen section at all.  As you no doubt know by now, we fully intend to take you up on your offer to help, and we are looking forward to your participation here at AAS !    Thank you for taking the time to write to us - it is deeply appreciated.

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"I am the mom of a mature-beyond-her-years-14-year-old daughter who is beginning to explore her sexuality with her boyfriend and they are discussing eventually having intercourse.  I grew up in a repressive, religious home and a lot of bad things happened as a result.  I resolved to treat the sex issue differently with my own kids, but have felt so alone in my attitudes about this aspect of parenting.

I want someone there to know how reassured I felt when I found this webpage.  Our society sends so many mixed messages to our children, especially adolescent girls.   We need to empower our children with information to help them sort through all the crap in the movies, tv, ads, etc., and discover who they are.  I applaud you for creating this venue - keep up the good work." - BearEQT - North America - Female - 40-49

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Thank You!    I come from Virginia, deep in the heart of Bible-belt territory. I find the ignorance here sickening, and am refreshed to be able to find people out there who share my views and who have something positive to say about sex. Year after year in sex-education classes, I am bombarded by negative messages insisting that sex is bad and that saying no is right (which I am deeply convinced is false). I am glad for once someone cares enough to speak for the other side of the arguement. Please continue to carry on this project.

Kyle - age group: 12 - 16

     Thanks, Kyle, we needed that!

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"I quite agree with what you said about sex being taboo. I'm not quite sure when it happened, really, but it does seem like in the last two or three years the attitudes of the early 80's and the even earlier 50's seems to have come to the surface and are prevalent.  Sometimes it really gets me down when I hear so many negative comments and hear so many people loudly proclaiming that teens need to wait until adulthood before exploring sex.  I mean, sheesh!, it is a NORMAL part of growing up and learning to be an adult...  but you would think we were talking about smoking and drinking instead of sex!"   --Christine -- age group: 18-22

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"I just went to check out your site, and think that it is WONDERFUL!!!!!   I haven't seen anything better on the web to date.  Keep up the good work.  If there is anything I can do to help, don't be afraid to ask."    --Melissa-- 18

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"I took a look at the website, and I am impressed by what I saw on a quick look around.  This kind of information needs to be available to everyone so they can have healthy, fulfilling relationships.   Drop me a line and let me know how else I can help."     --Rebecca R--

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Dear AAS,

I am a sex educator and am interested in helping out.  I have viewed your website extensively and I feel comfortable in recommending it as a legitimate site for anyone interested in sexuality issues.

You are so right in that children want to know how the information affects them NOW. When I taught 8th grade sexuality, some of the questions students would ask were very thought provoking. My favorite was, "What is the definition of virginity? I have experimented with sex with people of the same gender, but I do not think I am homosexual. Am I still a virgin?"

I enjoyed showing how all of life was related to sexuality. I taught my students that sex is the greatest metaphor for all of life.

Unfortunately, some teachers on our campus were criticized for their openness and willingness to answer questions. Thank God I never had to answer to my administrators. However, because enough complaints came in from parents to administrators, the administration decided to develop policies which were limiting to the education. It became sterile (pardon the pun). The best part of our program was the open honesty and willingness to answer questions outside the official curriculum.

Let me know what you want me to do."     --Christopher Z.--

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"I have been reading your web page.  Excellent.  Very well written, and laid out.  Just what is needed.  Easy on the eye, and the content is spot on.  I will be happy to promote it when you are ready. I post on a number of parenting groups, and I also run an organisation called the "Nurturing Center" where we give free advice to parents and potential parents on nurturing.  It will be wonderful to have such a resource to direct them to for this info. 

Randal wrote...

    "People who have studied this point out that what is at the root of this phenomenom is a father's guilt for being attracted to their daughter's emerging sexuality.  Not just guilt, but outright fear."

Yes, yes, and still more yes.  You are spot on.  I really must commend you for your insight, and general approach.  It is badly needed. You have so much info. it will take me a while to read it all!"     --Rayner--

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"I just checked this site out and have to say that I'm very impressed.  You have built a site which is attractive for pre-teens/teens (aka cool graphics) and which is very informative.  It seems to answer the questions our kids have that seem to never be answered. 

I thought the pre-teens section was great!  I have a daughter who is 12 and I would love for her to read it....  I bookmarked the site and plan to take her there the next time questions/subjects or experiences happen to provoke a discussion.  As a parent, I think sites like this not only help *us* but they make it easier for parents and kids to discuss these topics together.  *pats Randal on the back*

I think the humor has good taste... sure, most of the "jokes" I have heard before but looking at it from a kid's point of view, it's appropriate and very funny.  More than likely it will make them laugh...  if anyone has a problem with that I would think I would ask, "so why don't we want our kids to laugh at a sexually oriented joke?"  What has caused us, as parents and as a society, to neglect our children of finding humorous things with sex, relationships and love??  Kinda sad if you ask me.  Since my approach to most things is with a sense of humor, I welcome this direction with the page and think it's very healthy for our kids to have a sense of humor in re: to sex.  I think as long as the joke doesn't cross the line of being non-consentual and of really BAD taste, it's cool.

Thank you for taking the time in getting back with me and for giving me the opportunity to view the page before the actual "cutting of the ribbon." :-)  I enjoyed it very much and feel that you have done a great job in putting things together in a very positive and informative way."     --Dee, of Oz--

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Would you believe that we have even more just like these?   We do!  All comments, good or bad, are welcome, and they do a lot to help the spirits of everyone now working on this project.

--Randal, Webmaster for AAS --





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